Standard disclaimers. The characters of YYH belong to whoever has/have a legal claim on them. I do not! The song 'I Grieve' belongs to its singer, copywriter, company, again, anyone who can lay a claim on it. Definitely not mine!!

Though I have not seen 'The City of the Angels', its soundtrack impresses me a lot. This is one of my favorite song, also my first earnest attempt at a song fic. Hope you find it pleasing.

Moondance

**************************************************************************************************************************

I Grieve by Peter Gabriel

The room was completely dark. Nothing shone. No moon, no stars, even a flicker of street lamp dared not to peek out its head amid the gloom. All cowered before the dark melancholy of the red haired young man sitting on his bed, head in his hands.

It was only one hour ago

In his mind, Kurama played out the scene of his parting with Hiei again and again, every look, every gesture, and every suppressed passionate word. Neither of them dared to look at each other in the eyes, fearing some uncontrollable protest would escape. Yet it had to be that way. It had to be.

It was all so different then

Because any word would seem to declare the cruelty of obligations to them, they both kept the eloquent silence, refusing to acknowledge the possibility that they would not see each other again in this lifetime.

Nothing yet has really sunk in

Still, Kurama wished that he said something, any thing that could remind Hiei of his love whenever he doubted. He said nothing in the end. Pretended till the end that they would see each other again tomorrow night. Pretended that life was not shattered, as if by denying, reality would not creep upon them.

Looks like it always did

Tried as they might to mask their outward appearance in normality, their love-making was particularly intense that night.

This flesh and bone

Somehow, Hiei's body looked almost holy to Kurama that night. Though it was no different from what he kissed and caressed hundred times over, he worshiped Hiei with a religious-like fanatic, offering upon the living altar his immortal soul and love.

It's just the way that we are tied in

Tonight of all the nights, Kurama felt for every second the soul binding he shared with Hiei, a rare experience. Yet he almost hated it this moment, for it reminded him even more of his loss.

But there's no one home

Empty. Crowded by lifeless objects, yet the room was empty. And he was just one more object, without the flame in his life to spark him up.

I grieve...

An escaped tear.

For you

A ghost of warmth.

You leave...

An open window.

Me

Nothing.

So hard to move on

Day light arrived, Kurama forced himself to stretch from his frozen position. All his limbs felt like deadweight, dragging him down to a hell of yawning pits of despair.

Still loving what's gone

He hurls himself down there gladly, even willingly, covered himself completely in the muck of anguish. If oblivion would be at the end of extreme pain, he would continue on.

Said life carries on...

Each giggle and squeal of his schoolmates stroked like knife-edge on his raw nerves. Kurama smiled. The more brilliant his smile was, the bloodier his wound was.

Carries on and on and on...

And he went on smiling. Forced himself to stare madness in the face.

And on

Without mercy.

The news that truly shocks

Even seeing the assassin he sent to kill Yomi touched him not at all.

Is the empty, empty page

Yet he shuddered and gasped in private at the evaluation sheet with Hiei's name written it.

While the final rattle rocks

That poor thing, no longer a man, did not even gasp when Kurama extinguish his life.

Its empty, empty cage...

Kurama sat alone in the cage afterwards, reflecting on past. Finally, he decided: if the purpose of every incident in his past was to build up for him to meet Hiei, it was well worth it.

And I can't handle this

Night after night, he would crumble in the middle of his bed.

I grieve...

Too pained even to cry.

For you

Kurama could only whisper Hiei's name over and over again, like a prayer.

You leave...

No, he would not remember their parting. Yet he could not stop from remembering that hopeless look on Hiei's face when he flashed out of the window.

Me

And I am once more alone.

Let it out and move on

He answered Yomi's invitation to Makai in an attempt to be closer to the object of his devotion.

Missing what's gone

Only to realize that the familiar surrounding only, if at all possible, carved out another piece of his battered heart.

Said life carries on...

Days.

I said life carries on and on...

Weeks.

And on

Months.

Life carries on in the people I meet

The joy of his trainees relieved not one bit of his sorrow.

In every one that's out on the street

People in Yomi's citadel watched him with fear and envy. Kurama ignored those stares.

In all the dogs and cats

A world devoid of laughter.

In the flies and rats

A world of festering wounds.

In the rot and the rust

A world of decay.

In the ashes and the dust

A world frozen in agony.

Life carries on and on and on...

Dead silence.

And on

Silence.

Life carries on and on and on...

Death.

Life carries on and on and on...

A blanket wrapped itself around Kurama's perceptions, rendering him incapable of any emotion than pain, any expression except a gentle, mocking smile.

And on

Day after day.

Life carries on and on and on...

Without respite.

Just the car that we ride in

An empty passenger seat.

The home we reside in

An empty room.

The face that we hide in

An empty face.

The way we are tied in

The only thing that reminded him that he was breathing was that tenuous line with Hiei's soul that throbbed within him with every breath he took.

As life carries on and on and on...

Else, he would have given up long ago.

And on

Now, the hold was flimsier than a spider's silk strand.

Life carries on and on and on..

When it snapped, so would Kurama's sanity.

Did I dream this belief?

Sometimes he wondered if he imagined Hiei's tender looks in his mind. The thought so frightened him that he shut that part of his mind down.

Or did I believe this dream

Sometimes he wondered if Hiei really meant every determined word he said to him. The notion of Hiei's betrayal nauseated him so he lied on the bed in a bundle of frayed nerves.

How I will find relief

Still, Kurama believed, too much in love to wish for salvation.

I grieve...