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because I'm still alive but I am still a victim because I cannot die. To die is to pass on to eternal paridise streets paves with gold, and every thought is nice. Am I a rape survivor or a rape victim, am I? because I re-live each moment, cannot escape my cries. Is he my victim because he knows what he did he can never feel good about himself and he'll always be a kid. Every day I remember and every night, re-live the feeling of hands how they made my body give. I have the mental scars never shall I live with perfect happiness but like an invalid I'll always be reminded with "I just wanna fly" but I have changed the words to "Please can I just die?" I'll always be a rape victim or am I a survivor?? Am I freezing cold, or standing in the fire? Never will I feel an embrace without a memory or hold someone's hand without thinking, "HE HELD ME" I hear he has a girlfriend now with the hands that hold her safe he held me and made me stay. He cannot give back the piece of me he took I feel like I am naked and forever he will look. And every arm that grabs me will remind me of his grab and every man with strength reminds me of the strength he had. So am I a survivor for every day I remember the way that he held me I'll be a victim forever. Mac like to be posted here, Mail me This site is where you can add your name to others who have survived childhood sexual abuseBreaking the Silence Comradery This site is where you can read other's stories of abuse and gain courage from them.Breaking the Silence Supported you through your trials inThe Rock of Support for all to see in The Wall Hope for Recovery who's only crime is trying to stay alive inNeal and Jesse of courage, tenasity, and ability to break the cycle against all odds in the amazing site called Ghostwolf 1-800-96-ABUSE |
